women's day my ass

It's International Women's Day. And I could be all poignant like some professional journalists who write for legitimate publications, but I just don't feel like it, mmmk?

What I'd really like to do is, in the words of my friend Aaron G (who I hope doesn't mind that I'm quoting him here):

"In honor of Womans Day, I will crush on a guy that obviously doesn't like me, then cry about it to my fat friend who obviusly does."

or

"In honor of Womans Day, I'm going to ask you if you've noticed anything different, but it's a trap: you will answer wrong."

or 

"In honor of Women's Day, I will eat an entire tub of cookie dough and tears ice cream. You don't think that exists?! I add the tears myself!"

and

"In honor of International Women's Day, I'm going to make a big deal about how having an international women's day is patronizing."

Because, let's face it ladies, that shit is funny. It's funny cuz it's true. So in honor of Women's Day, let's  dial down the crazy and objectify men instead:

Oh and this is my 100th blog post! Let's all raise a glass and toast that shit, yo.