over whelm ed

One word: overwhelmed

I arrived in Portland yesterday afternoon and it's been a whirlwind of unpacking, exploring, and settling in. And it all hit me like a ton of bricks, oh...37 minutes ago. I am exhausted.

And I have so many stories to tell from this whole process, from packing everything into storage in the hot sun (and smushing what I can't live without and my cats into my car) to the drive up here to the last two days. But I haven't even processed it all yet. Which means I'll probably forget most of it and lose valuable blog fodder, but hell, my head is so full of information right now.

It feels somewhat similar to my first week living in Paris (without the cultural and language barrier plus a huge time change). Not only was I thrown into a whole new place with zero knowledge of my basic surroundings and how to get around, but I was also thrown into it practically alone and jumped right in the deep end (My very first day, even before a nap, shower, or any unpacking, I was to meet up with my fellow students. So my host mom pointed out the metro stop and sent me on my way.). That first week was a whirlwind of learning the city, the metro, reading maps, finding necessities, taking entrance exams to the Sorbonne, and practicing the language. And by the end of the 2nd day, my head was going to explode.

It also should be noted that I adjusted to France so much easier than I did to the US when I came back home. Once I got the basic hang of it, Paris suited me.

I am lucky in many regards. I have my very best friend here and her boyfriend. I am not alone trying to navigate a new city on pure luck. There is no language barrier and no time change (so no jet lag, hooray!). And I do know like two other people here that I know I could call if I need to. I am not adrift in a foreign place with drastic cultural differences (well, sort of, Southern Cal is still pretty damn different).

But after packing up in the heat (more to come on that later), driving with my bestie (thanks pete for her!) and my two cats for 3 fucking days, and my new home, I am totally and completely hitting a wall.

Plus I didn't really sleep last night. My cats are not stoked about their new home yet and jumped all over me crying and mewling all night. Also a homeless man has apparently decided that the spot he should loudly sort through bottles at 2 am is right under my bedroom window. And I'll be sleeping on an air mattress for the next month or so (until I get my bed) and I hadn't quite filled it full enough and was drowning in my damn bed. So I'm tired.

And emotional. For reasons I hesitate to discuss on the all humiliation network (aka the Internet). And I'm probably not processing well due to the general exhausted state of my cabesa, but I'm feeling full of the emotion nonetheless.

So I need to just take a little time to adjust. Get a good night's sleep. Unpack my clothes (even though I have no furniture) because I can't find a fucking thing. And then venture out to explore again. Because I really am so excited for my new city. And my neighborhood is super fucking cute. And I can't wait to go for a run.

Please don't take my attitude personally, Portland. It's just that you're so cool, I don't know what to do with you yet.

Give me a little time to get to know you better.